Sunday, August 23, 2020

Discipleship message

Okay I just feel like I should share this. Recently God has given me a mentor to mentor me in my walk and I have changed for the best. Anyways, on Saturday August 22nd God called me to step outside my comfort zone and share with the ladies of my church my experience. I have talked to many of the ladies and they all said I blessed them. Many told me I did very well and that I was a good writer and one even said I was very articulate in my writing. I felt like I should share what I spoke about here. I wrote this all on my own and I came up with the bible verses and quotes... my mentor just made it more broader for me. 


Q: Tell us a little bit about yourself?

A: My name is Amelia. I am 36 years old. I am married to James and we have been married for almost 10 years. We have a son named Malcolm who is 4 years old. We have been attending Clovis EV Free for 13 years. James and I came to know Christ at a Sunday morning service in our 3rd year attending Clovis Ev Free. Over the years I have struggled emotionally and physically. Anxiety and depression are things I struggle with on a regular basis. Marriage and parenting have been a challenge for me. I've had some health issues on and off as well. At times, my struggles have affected my work, my relationships, and have been apparent on my social media as well. At the beginning of the summer when we read the book Messy Beautiful Friendship, by Christine Hoover, I really connected with somethings she wrote. She said, "Facebook and Instagram generate the absolute worst taunts when our minds are tangled up in the belief that we're the only ones. When I see a picture of two people I know hanging out, my reflexive thought is, Why wasn't I invited? Even if I barely know those people. Even if they are hanging out clear across the country. Even in reality I'm not that interested in actually hanging out. I just want to be chosen and loved. We all do." I realized that I was seeking love and affirmation through Facebook rather than seeking those things in Christ. Another thing Christine Hoover wrote is, "Our words have the power to stir up love and good works in the lives of our friends." I realized that this is how I should be using social media.


Q: I'd like to ask you a little bit about your experience regarding discipleship. Would that be okay

A: Absolutely.


Q: Is there anything you'd like to share as we begin?

A: Well, I'm nervous. Usually, I don't talk very much in groups. This is outside of my comfort zone, but when Jennae texted me and asked me to share I really wanted to because I hope that the struggles I have been through and knowing about the discipleship relationship God has blessed me with can be used by God to bless others.


Q: How did you connect with your mentor? Did she approach you, or did you ask her?

A: She approached me. She noticed that I was struggling and that I needed some help. She shared with me that she had experienced some of the same struggles. She told me that she wanted to help me. She said that she wanted to be my friend and I was not her project.


Q: Did you have any fears about this? If so, what were they?

A: Yes, I was very scared about opening up to her because I was scared of what she would think about me. I have a tendency to care too much about what others think about me and thinking that what they think about me is true. When I was growing up people, even people in my own family, focused a lot on my disabilities, bullied me, called me names. It was very hurtful and had a lasting affect on me. What I’ve learned from God’s Word is that I don't need to worry about what others think about me because God is making me into the person He wants me to be and He is my perfect Father. What I need to care about is that I am living in a way that pleases Him and not others. 


Q: What were your expectations when you began meeting with your mentor?

A: My hope was that I would change because I was very unhappy. I was tired of feeling worried and anxious all the time. I needed to learn how to trust God, but it was hard to do that because I didn’t know Him very well.


Q: Were your expectations validated or seem foolish once you started meeting?

A: Well, my fears were understandable but they weren't necessary because my mentor seeks to love me as God has loved her. She really cares about my well-being and she is patient with me as I grow in my understanding of what it means to walk by faith in obedience to God's commands and apply the Word of God to all of my life. 

John 13: 34-35 in the ESV says, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” In the book Messy Beautiful Friendship Christine Hoover says, "A godly friend is one who embraces us in our weakness, listens to our uncertainty, and then points us to God, but we can only give and receive this ministry when vulnerability pervades the atmosphere between us and our friends." My mentor and I have this kind of relationship. We can be vulnerable with each other


Q: Did she have similar or different expectations?

A: When we first started meeting I wasn’t sure what her expectations were, but once we started to meet and we talked about it we seemed to be on the same page and have the same expectations.


Q: What did you think discipleship was before you were discipled?

A: Before I started meeting with my mentor I thought that discipleship was just meeting with someone. I took the liberty to look up the definition of discipleship and this is what I learned, in the Christian sense discipleship is the process of helping someone become like Christ. The disciple of Christ is to become like Christ in everything. The primary purpose of Jesus' coming to the world was to establish the kingdom of God through his life, death, and resurrection. The Webster's definition of a disciple is “a pupil or follower of any teacher or school. A true disciple is not just a student or a learner, but a follower: one who applies what he has learned. 


Q: How did your understanding of discipleship change after you started meeting with your mentor?

A: After looking up the definitions and meeting with her I have a better understanding of what a disciple is and as a disciple of Christ, I know that I have to be both a hearer and a doer of His Word.  


Q: How often do the two of you meet and what does your time together look like?

A: We get together weekly and we share a meal together. We have read a whole bunch of books together about the attributes of God, the fear of God versus the fear of man, about how people change and grow in Christ, we go over things from the women's Bible studies, and more recently we have been learning about prayer and how to pray. It is also very common for us to text daily just to check in on each other.


Q: How has a discipleship relationship changed your relationship with Jesus and your understanding of the Bible?

A: I have recognized my sins and I have realized that I need to change. It shows in my relationships at home, at church, at work, and on Facebook. One of the books my mentor and I are reading right now is, Need to Know by Gary Millar and in that book the author says, "It's an exciting lifetime project of changing and growing and being transformed, bit by bit, to be like Jesus- until God finishes the work in eternity." This is what my goal and hope is, to be like Jesus.


Q: Is there anything else you’d like to share with us in closing?

A: Yes, I'd like to leave you ladies with two of my favorite Bible verses. The first is Philippians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." And the second is, “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." Matthew 6:34



Sunday, November 18, 2018

S.O.A.P journaling method

S: But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity. Amen. (2 Peter 3:18).
O: From this verse I learn that we are to glorify God both in the present day and when the day of eternity comes. The speaker of this verse is Simon Peter and I believe he is speaking to the Gentiles.
A: There is so much going on that is causing me a lot of stress and anxiety and it is causing me to complain more and more, so instead of complaining and worrying I can grow in the grace and knowledge of what our Lord has done for us. He died on the cross for my sins and yes my Lord has provided for me once before and he continues to provide for me. I need to glorify my Savior more and I need to praise him for all the good things he has done in my life. He has made me a wife, a mother, a friend, a daughter, a granddaughter and so much more. I am very blessed to be saved.
P: This is my prayer: Father, thank you for always being there in my time of need and thank you for providing for my family when we are in need. Thank you for showing me your love through my sisters and brothers in Christ. Please help me to not complain and help me not to stress, worry, or be anxious when things do not go my way. Amen. 











Thursday, October 11, 2018

Meditation on dandelions and rest

Okay so most of you know I went to a retreat with the ladies of Clovis Ev Free. There was 17 of us who went. We had two speakers Jennae England and her friend Andrea Burns. The theme was restore and the dandelion was what was on our booklets. Who knew a dandelion could be so much like our walk with Jesus. We even made a shirt with dandelions. We had so much fun. I even had a swan come very close to me and I was able to take an amazing picture. I learned so much over the three days I was there. I learned that we shouldn't make our desires His to do list, if we aren't listening to Him he will not allow us to rest, do not hang on to things, let God take things out and put things in, we are made in the image of God, don't be quick to find rest in ourselves, it is God alone who makes us alive, it is by grace alone that we are saved, we can't take credit for being born again, in whatever we need to be content, we need to learn how to be content, it is through Him that we can find rest and contentment, the six steps of daily refreshment: 1. read God's word, 2. pray (A.C.T.S.), 3. meditate, 4. memorize, 5. attend church, 6. find accountability partners, the Lord knows what is broken, He is interested in our complete healing, our role is to glorify Him, God has a plan and purpose for our trials, we need God's help, so we should not be afraid to ask him for his help, none of us is finished, we have each other, re-joy- joy again and again, we should rejoice internally (with our hearts and minds) and externally (using our mouths, to sing a hymn, sing praise, praise in confession, and together), we rejoice all the time (in good and bad times) and resting in God takes the pressure off of us. So you are probably wondering about the A.C.T.S prayer. I was given this by a sister in Christ and it works wonder. First, you start with adoration (the characteristics of God... he is worthy, he is almighty, he is powerful, etc.), second you confess your sins (confession), third you give God thanks (thanksgiving), and last you give him your request or your prayers (supplication). Now what does the dandelion have to do with our walk with Jesus. Well I will explain it but first not before we learn a bit about the dandelion. So a dandelion is a weed and weeds our disruptive. To some a dandelion is seen as a wish. I remember when I was little I remember always making a wish off of a dandelion. I loved picking them and blowing the seeds off. So a dandelion represents God's passion, it is edible, it is a good substitute for coffee, it has abundance of nutrients and all kinds of vitamins, it detoxes, and it purifies blood building. If you have facebook go check out my messy desk. Anyways here is how the word or our walk is like a dandelion. First a dandelion roots, then it reaches, then it reflects, then it rests, and then finally it releases. And this is how we should be. First we should root ourselves in the word and then we should reach to God and then we should reflect on what we learned and then we should rest in what we learned, and then finally we should release the word into the world and  spread the good news. In all honesty, who knew that a dandelion could be so much like our walk with Jesus? I sure didn't until retreat and I pray that I can encourage you all with this blog and help you live this out. I also pray I can live this out myself. Just remember our God is bigger than any problem or trial and God is our reward.

My home for 3 days

Mine and Becky's cabin

Swimming Swan

Swan

Mine and Becky's shirt (mine is the purple one)


Raw Dandelion Root Tea 

Chapel 

Dandelions 

Our set up in the meeting room

Andrea and Jennae 

Who knew I encouraged so many of the ladies

Our whole group 
(sorry Carol Turner is cut off and Sarah was taking the picture)

Dandelion shirt making group

Jennae and Andrea 

Pam and Jennae 

Roasted Dandelion Root Tea 
(I found this at Walmart and I love it)

Saturday, April 21, 2018

2018 Three Rivers Jazzaffair

It is that time again where I update you on yet another jazz festival. James, Malcolm and I went to Three Rivers Jazzaffair April 13th to April 15th. We had such a blast. Before we left Fresno we had to run some errands. I had to go get my paycheck and then we had to go to my bank and James bank and to get gas. And then we left at about 11 am. We made it to Exeter at 12:21 pm on Friday and we unloaded the car and had lunch and packed our meal for dinner and my mom trimmed Malcolm's hair. Then we went to the dollar store and to A & W for Rootbeer floats. Then after A & W we went up the hill to Three Rivers. At 2:45 pm my mom and dad went to St. Anthony's Retreat to sell cds for Cornet Chop Suey and James, Malcolm and I went to the Memorial Building to sell cds for Blue Street. Then at 4 pm we headed to the Lions Arena and we watched High Street play and after that set James, Malcolm, and I sold cds for Blue Street. Then after Blue Street we stayed and we watched Cornet Chop Suey. Then at 7:45 pm we went to the Memorial Building and we watched High Sierra play. And right after that we partied with High Street. Malcolm danced with Sylvia at that set. On Saturday we got up early and we had breakfast at the hotel and then we headed up the hill. At 9:45 am James, Malcolm and I sold cds for Blue Street at St. Anothy's Retreat. Then we went to the hospitality room and hung out with some of the musicians. Malcolm enjoyed that a lot and Sam took a picture of Malcolm and then he sent it to his mom. I love how much the musicians love us. At 12:15 pm we watched Cornet Chop Suey and then we watched a little bit of High Street (we had to leave early). Then at 2:45 pm we went to the Lions Arena and we sold cds for Blue Street. James, Malcolm, and I stayed and ate lunch while Tom Rigney was playing. Then at 5:15 pm Cornet Chop Suey played. At 6:30 pm we went to the Memorial Building and we sat and talked to some of our friends and Malcolm kept on saying Hey Babe to Sylvia. Then at 7:45 pm we sold cds for Blue Street. On Sunday we woke up and had breakfast and packed up and then we headed up the hill. As we headed up the hill we took some pictures. At 10:15 am we went to the Memorial Building and sold cds. Dave gave a great message on complaining/grumbling (something I defiantly needed). And then after that set James, Malcolm, and I got to catch up with my mentor and her husband for 20 to 30 minutes. We had some lunch with them. Then at 1 pm we headed to St. Anthony's Retreat and we sold cds for Blue Street. Malcolm got to help Matty carry in his banjo/guitar stand and he jammed out on the drums with Sam for a bit.  I wish I got a picture of that. After that set we said our goodbyes and then we headed to the Lions Arena and we watched Cornet Chop Suey and we had our second lunch. Then we went to Reimers for some ice cream and to buy some candy. The highlights of this festival was Malcolm dancing with Sylvia, catching up with my mentor and her husband, Dave's message, Malcolm jamming out on the drums with Sam, having a rootbeer float, having ice cream at Reimers, Malcolm flirting with Sylvia, Malcolm saying Hey babe to Sylvia, partying with High Street, seeing how high the rivers are, and Malcolm getting his hair trimmed.

Malcolm's new hair cut

Grandma trimmed Malcolm's hair

Snow on the mountains

Mommy and Malcolm

Mommy, Daddy, and Malcolm

Grandma, Grandpa, and Malcolm


Malcolm 

Mommy and Malcolm at the Museum

Grandma and Malcolm at the Museum

Helping uncle Matty


Malcolm laughing

Grandma feeding Malcolm ice cream




Saturday, February 24, 2018

2018 Fresno Mardi Gras

Oh my goodness it has been exactly one year since I have posted. I have been so busy. We went back home for our birthdays. In August we went to Sacramento for the Sweet and Hot and for my parents' anniversary. Then we went back home for the Pismo Jazz festival and our anniversary in October. And we went home for Thanksgiving and Christmas. We took Malcolm to Avila Valley Farm for the first time and to Monarch Grove and we took him to meet Santa Claus and see some Christmas trees. In January we celebrated Malcolm's 2nd birthday. He had a party at his Shepherd's house and then we went to Chuck E. Cheese on his birthday with Brian and Becky. He had so much fun with that but he was afraid of Chuck. And now for what this post is really about. Anyways, Thursday February 8th grandma Shonda and Tim came and we celebrated his birthday with them and Becky came as well. Malcolm got some great presents. He got some Paw Patrol toys and he got a toy drum set which he loves and he got a wagon which is great for the jazz festivals. My mom and Tim also brought some of the stuff that was given to us by my grandma Holm including Malcolm's cornet and trumpet that we got during Christmas time but we couldn't get it into the car. Grandma Holm also gave Malcolm a few books and a Thomas the train blow up bed which is great for the jazz festivals. We also had Tim take some things back so we could fit our new couch and love seat in our living room. Then early Friday February 9th we sent Tim on his way back and James, Malcolm, my mom, and I all went to the jazz festival and we ended up listening to some Gino and the Lone Gunmen in the Atrium and then we went to Subway and we ate our lunch and then we went back and walked around and James and I got our badges and then James took me to work while grandma took Malcolm around. I am not sure what bands James and my mom went to but I know at 1:45 pm they sold for Blue Street and the first set the singer was not there. Then when I got off at 5:30 we went back to the Double Tree and we sold for Blue Street with their special guest Randi Cee. After that set we headed to the Atrium and we watched Grand Dominion with their special guest Brian Casserly and at that time my dad came. Then at 8 pm we went to Salon C/D and we watched Sister Swing and then we watched Gino and the Lone Gunmen. Then we came home and had dinner and put Malcolm to sleep. Saturday February 10th we woke up early and got ready and we went to the Sequoia room and we listened to Devil Mountain at 10 am. Then after that at 11:15 am we went to Salon C/D and we sold cds for Blue Street. After that set we went to the Atrium and we watched the Dixie Dominus for a little bit and then we went and we ate lunch. Then at 1:45 pm we went to Salon A and we watched Gator Nation and then Gino and the Lone Gunmen. Malcolm ended up taking a nap so we laid him down in his wagon. After Gino and the Lone Gunmen we watched Yosemite Jazz Band. Then we headed to the Atrium and sold cds for Blue Street at 5:30 pm. Then at 6:45 pm we headed to the Salon C/D and we watched Tom Hook and then Gino and the Lone Gunmen's Elvis set and then Gator Nation. I ended up walking between Gino's set and Blue Street's set because we didn't realize they were playing at the same time and James told Gino he would sell cds for him. After the Gator Nation set we came home and we had dinner and put Malcolm to sleep. Then Sunday we woke up early and headed to the gospel set. James and I bought some coffee from Starbucks. Blue Street's gospel set started at 9:30 am and it was in Salon C/D. We sold out of cds at that set. Then at 10:45 am we went to Salon A and we watched Gino and the Lone Gunmen's last set and we said bye to Gino. At noon we went to Salon C/D and we watched Sister Swing and then at 1:15 pm we went to Sequoia room and we watched Blue Street's last set. The whole time we were at that set Malcolm was blowing kisses to his adoptive auntie. After that set we talked to Malcolm's adoptive auntie and she blew him kisses back and then we said bye to everyone else and then we came back home. My parents' packed up and then they headed back home and I ended up taking a nap. We had Shepherd's group that Sunday but we ended up not going because we were so tired. The highlights of the festival was Malcolm blowing kisses to his adoptive auntie, my mom and dad meeting Ashley Kothe and Sammy's parents, buying a mask from Ashley for Malcolm, doing the parasol parade and the masquerade parade, Malcolm trying to get a kiss from Ashley's youngest daughter and Malcolm jumping in Ashley's oldest daughter's lap and giving her a hug, Malcolm dancing with the swing dancers, me getting my Gino and the Lone Gunmen shirt from my mom, getting my new hat from my mom, and of course all the swing dances I got to dance.



                                                     My mom, James, Malcolm


Dancing with Grandma


Grandma and Malcolm with a pirate minion


Grandma and Malcolm


Dancing with one of my dance partners


Mommy and Malcolm during the Masquerade parade


Masquerade Parade 


Grandma and Malcolm during the Masquerade Parade


Daddy and Malcolm during the Masquerade Parade 


Daddy, Mommy, and Malcolm during the Masquerade Parade 


Malcolm in his new mask 


Sitting listening to the band play


Elvis Smile


Grandpa and Grandma


Grandma and Gino


Me in my new hat 


Nap Time


Swing Dancing with Tom


Me in my Gino and the Lone Gunmen shirt





Saturday, May 13, 2017

2017 Fresno Mardi Gras and 2017 Three Rivers Jazzaffair

Okay I realize it is May and the Fresno Mardi Gras was in February and Three Rivers jazzaffair was last month. I have been really bad at giving jazz updates and just updating my blog all together. Malcolm keeps me very very busy. He is now walking and talking. Malcolm can say so many words and he can say some sentence. One day I was holding him and he said wash and I said wash what and he replied with wash me. Another day as I was holding him he looked at a picture on the wall of him and he said that's me. He has so much personality and he is such a ham. Anyways, lets get started with the festivals. I will start with the Fresno Mardi Gras of course. Friday after I got off work James and I headed to the Double Tree where the festival was held. We hung out for a bit and then we watched all the swing sets which were Gino & the Lone Gunmen, Sister Swing, and of course Blue Street all in Salon C/D. We sold cds for Blue Street. Then Saturday we started our day at 12:30 pm in the Sequoia room. Malcolm got to meet Susan and John Rocha and he got to dance with Susan then as well. We took a family picture as well. Before we started selling cds on Saturday though we hung out in the Atrium and we just relaxed for a bit. At 3 pm we went and we watched Zydeco Flames in Salon A and that was the time of the parasol parade which Malcolm was in with my friend Ashley. After that we sold cds for Blue Street in Salon C/D. That is when Malcolm met Brady McKay and I must say Brady loved Malcolm. Malcolm also got to play with my mentor's daughter a bit. Malcolm even got to hang out with Susan and John at that set for a bit. Then at 5:30 we went to Gino and the Lone Gunmen's Johnny Cash set which was such a blast and that was in the Salon A. Then at 6:45 pm in Salon A we sold cds for Blue Street and Malcolm joined the Masquerade parade with Ashley. Then we ended our night listening to Gino and the Lone Gunmen's Mardi Gras party set in Salon C/D. Malcolm danced with Rebecca, Connie, and Terrey. Ashley and Rebecca and Conie and Terrey all gave Malcolm a balloon to take home that night. Then Sunday we started at 9:30 am in Salon C/D with Blue Street's gospel set. After that set we talked with Connie and Terrey and Rebecca and Malcolm fell asleep on Connie. Then at 1:15 pm in Salon C/D we watched Gino and the Lone Gunmen play their last set. Malcolm ended up dancing with Brady McKay and he danced in the back with Ashley as well. I have so many highlights at this festival but a few is when Malcolm got to do both parades with Ashley, and he got to dance with all of the fans and family members of the bands, watching him dance to Gino and the Lone Gunmen, and the most favorite one of them all was to see how his face lit up when he received his balloons.

Dancing with Susan Rocha

Parasol Parade

Kisses from Ashley

Masquerade Parade

Dancing with Connie, Terrey, and Rebecca

Malcolm with his balloon

Taking a nap before Gino and the Lone Gunmen

Dancing with Brady McKay

Now we will go into Three Rivers Jazzaffair. We met my mom, dad, and Grandpa Paul in Three Rivers on Thursday. First, we had some lunch in Exeter at A & W and then we took Malcolm up the hill where we dropped my Grandpa off at St. Anthony's retreat and then we came back to Exeter and got our stuff unpacked and then we went and had root beer floats. Then on Friday we didn't have to be with Blue Street until 5:15 pm and my mom and dad didn't have to be with Cornet Chop Suey until 6:30 pm so we went sight seeing for quiet some time. First, we went to old town Exeter and looked at the murals and then we drove up the hill and looked at the river, the museums, and the shops. We then went back to Exeter and had some lunch and then we took both cars back up the hill. My mom and dad watch Blue Street as James and I sold cds for them at St. Anthony's retreat. After, that my mom and dad sold cds for Cornet Chop Suey and James and I watched them for a bit before we headed to the Lion's Arena. At 7:45 pm we sold for Blue Street at the Lion's Arena. We met my mom and dad back at the hotel and we had a late dinner. James even caught Malcolm in the refrigerator. Then Saturday we all started our day at 11 am. My parents sold for Cornet Chop Suey and James and I went and we watched High Street because that was the only time we could see them play. Malcolm enjoyed them so much that he was dancing in the isles and he was dancing on the dance floor. The band loved watching him. James and I watched a little bit of Shelley, Bill, and Eddie play and then at 1:30 pm we sold cds at the Lion's Arena for Blue Street. Malcolm enjoyed dancing for the audience in that set as well. We ended up at the Memorial Building to have some lunch and since Malcolm was asleep Sylvia was watching him while we ate our lunch. Well my mom saw James and I so she asked us where Malcolm was and I showed her. Long story short Sylvia armed wrestled my mom to see who would get Malcolm. It ended up my mom won so we walked down to the Memorial Tent and we watched Dixie Dominus (they are such a great youth band) and then we watched Cornet Chop Suey. After that at 5:15 pm we headed up to the Memorial Building and we sold cds for Blue Street. Malcolm joined a parasol parade at that set. Then we watched High Sierra and Titan Hot Seven and then we headed down to the Memorial Tent at 9 pm and we sold cds for Blue Street. On Sunday at 10:15 am we went to the Memorial Building and we sold cds for Blue Street's gospel set and then we walked down to the Memorial Tent and we watched Cornet Chop Suey play. After that set we went to St Anthony's Retreat and we walked around and took pictures and talked to some of the High Street band members. I had so many highlights at this festival as well, but a few of my favorites was watching Malcolm dance to High Street, watching him when his auntie Sherri would sing and watching Sylvia and my mom arm wrestle (I still wish I got a picture or a video of that).

James, Malcolm and I in Exeter

Malcolm at the Three Rivers Museum

Me playing with a puppet

Malcolm dancing 

Malcolm in the refrigerator

Malcolm in the hotel room

Listening to auntie Sherri sing 

Greetings from Matt, Bruce, and Steve

Malcolm and Mommy

Malcolm and Grandma

Malcolm and Grandpa

Snow