Okay I just feel like I should share this. Recently God has given me a mentor to mentor me in my walk and I have changed for the best. Anyways, on Saturday August 22nd God called me to step outside my comfort zone and share with the ladies of my church my experience. I have talked to many of the ladies and they all said I blessed them. Many told me I did very well and that I was a good writer and one even said I was very articulate in my writing. I felt like I should share what I spoke about here. I wrote this all on my own and I came up with the bible verses and quotes... my mentor just made it more broader for me.
Q: Tell us a little bit about yourself?
A: My name is Amelia. I am 36 years old. I am married to James and we have been married for almost 10 years. We have a son named Malcolm who is 4 years old. We have been attending Clovis EV Free for 13 years. James and I came to know Christ at a Sunday morning service in our 3rd year attending Clovis Ev Free. Over the years I have struggled emotionally and physically. Anxiety and depression are things I struggle with on a regular basis. Marriage and parenting have been a challenge for me. I've had some health issues on and off as well. At times, my struggles have affected my work, my relationships, and have been apparent on my social media as well. At the beginning of the summer when we read the book Messy Beautiful Friendship, by Christine Hoover, I really connected with somethings she wrote. She said, "Facebook and Instagram generate the absolute worst taunts when our minds are tangled up in the belief that we're the only ones. When I see a picture of two people I know hanging out, my reflexive thought is, Why wasn't I invited? Even if I barely know those people. Even if they are hanging out clear across the country. Even in reality I'm not that interested in actually hanging out. I just want to be chosen and loved. We all do." I realized that I was seeking love and affirmation through Facebook rather than seeking those things in Christ. Another thing Christine Hoover wrote is, "Our words have the power to stir up love and good works in the lives of our friends." I realized that this is how I should be using social media.
Q: I'd like to ask you a little bit about your experience regarding discipleship. Would that be okay
A: Absolutely.
Q: Is there anything you'd like to share as we begin?
A: Well, I'm nervous. Usually, I don't talk very much in groups. This is outside of my comfort zone, but when Jennae texted me and asked me to share I really wanted to because I hope that the struggles I have been through and knowing about the discipleship relationship God has blessed me with can be used by God to bless others.
Q: How did you connect with your mentor? Did she approach you, or did you ask her?
A: She approached me. She noticed that I was struggling and that I needed some help. She shared with me that she had experienced some of the same struggles. She told me that she wanted to help me. She said that she wanted to be my friend and I was not her project.
Q: Did you have any fears about this? If so, what were they?
A: Yes, I was very scared about opening up to her because I was scared of what she would think about me. I have a tendency to care too much about what others think about me and thinking that what they think about me is true. When I was growing up people, even people in my own family, focused a lot on my disabilities, bullied me, called me names. It was very hurtful and had a lasting affect on me. What I’ve learned from God’s Word is that I don't need to worry about what others think about me because God is making me into the person He wants me to be and He is my perfect Father. What I need to care about is that I am living in a way that pleases Him and not others.
Q: What were your expectations when you began meeting with your mentor?
A: My hope was that I would change because I was very unhappy. I was tired of feeling worried and anxious all the time. I needed to learn how to trust God, but it was hard to do that because I didn’t know Him very well.
Q: Were your expectations validated or seem foolish once you started meeting?
A: Well, my fears were understandable but they weren't necessary because my mentor seeks to love me as God has loved her. She really cares about my well-being and she is patient with me as I grow in my understanding of what it means to walk by faith in obedience to God's commands and apply the Word of God to all of my life.
John 13: 34-35 in the ESV says, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” In the book Messy Beautiful Friendship Christine Hoover says, "A godly friend is one who embraces us in our weakness, listens to our uncertainty, and then points us to God, but we can only give and receive this ministry when vulnerability pervades the atmosphere between us and our friends." My mentor and I have this kind of relationship. We can be vulnerable with each other
Q: Did she have similar or different expectations?
A: When we first started meeting I wasn’t sure what her expectations were, but once we started to meet and we talked about it we seemed to be on the same page and have the same expectations.
Q: What did you think discipleship was before you were discipled?
A: Before I started meeting with my mentor I thought that discipleship was just meeting with someone. I took the liberty to look up the definition of discipleship and this is what I learned, in the Christian sense discipleship is the process of helping someone become like Christ. The disciple of Christ is to become like Christ in everything. The primary purpose of Jesus' coming to the world was to establish the kingdom of God through his life, death, and resurrection. The Webster's definition of a disciple is “a pupil or follower of any teacher or school. A true disciple is not just a student or a learner, but a follower: one who applies what he has learned.
Q: How did your understanding of discipleship change after you started meeting with your mentor?
A: After looking up the definitions and meeting with her I have a better understanding of what a disciple is and as a disciple of Christ, I know that I have to be both a hearer and a doer of His Word.
Q: How often do the two of you meet and what does your time together look like?
A: We get together weekly and we share a meal together. We have read a whole bunch of books together about the attributes of God, the fear of God versus the fear of man, about how people change and grow in Christ, we go over things from the women's Bible studies, and more recently we have been learning about prayer and how to pray. It is also very common for us to text daily just to check in on each other.
Q: How has a discipleship relationship changed your relationship with Jesus and your understanding of the Bible?
A: I have recognized my sins and I have realized that I need to change. It shows in my relationships at home, at church, at work, and on Facebook. One of the books my mentor and I are reading right now is, Need to Know by Gary Millar and in that book the author says, "It's an exciting lifetime project of changing and growing and being transformed, bit by bit, to be like Jesus- until God finishes the work in eternity." This is what my goal and hope is, to be like Jesus.
Q: Is there anything else you’d like to share with us in closing?
A: Yes, I'd like to leave you ladies with two of my favorite Bible verses. The first is Philippians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." And the second is, “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." Matthew 6:34
